What is tenderness?

A reflection on the nature of tenderness and its expression in social relationships. 

Defining tenderness with words is not easy, but if we consult the dictionary it comes to tell us first that it is a feeling of endearing affection that we manifest before people, animals, things or situations because of their sweetness, naivety, weakness, kindness, naivety delicacy, innocence, affection, affection or love.


The second reading that gives us the meaning of tenderness is that it is a pure and spontaneous feeling that we demonstrate with infinite care and an instinctive and disinterested need to protect and care for that being or object.

But a third reading could still be made about what tenderness means and that is that it is a subjective feeling. 

That is, not all of us awaken the feeling of tenderness or the same things or the same people.

For many people, the fact that their partner, loved ones or friends count among their personality traits the quality of tenderness is a very desirable added value because if they cannot be selfish acts.

Tenderness is a state of mind where sweetness and unconditional love are mixed that comforts those who receive it and those who offer it. 

It relieves children, the sick, the depressed ... but sometimes it is difficult for us to express this feeling because it can expose our own vulnerability.

In any case, when we offer tenderness, we never seek personal satisfaction, but on the contrary, the relief of the other.

Psychology of tenderness

However, tenderness is also analyzed from a scientific point of view by psychology, although very recently, which defines it as a comforting emotion.

For psychology, indeed, tenderness goes beyond a sensation or a gesture towards something or someone, and it is also postulated as a type of language that has its translation in our relationships and whose implementation is very beneficial for our well-being.

In other words, practicing tenderness makes us feel good because it connects us with an emotional register that makes us experience calm, confidence and positivity when we carry it out. 

And although it may seem a lie, because of the material world in which we are immersed, there are many studies that show that tenderness continues to triumph. 

For this reason, they make us enjoy, for example, videos with animal puppies. In this case, these have a high therapeutic power generating psychological well-being.

Psychology also says in relation to tenderness that applying it provides quality to our bonds, although currently in this field it is a somewhat neglected aspect. 

Tenderness is an act that translates into affection and empathy within our social relationships because it is carried out directly through closeness and brings out our sweetest and most sensitive part of us.

In this way, in the couple, tenderness gives meaning to love. Without those gestures full of tenderness that we give to the other, love is not understood, neither is sexuality nor coexistence. 

It would be missing an important element that we transmit through the language of tenderness and that the other person perceives and makes them feel loved, respected, valuable and safe.

In the world of children and animals the power of tenderness is almost magical. Not only does it favor the instinct to protect and care in those who practice it, but whoever needs it registers it as a wake-up call.

The value of tenderness

Tenderness is when someone cares for you and caresses you feeling protected and calm, but without possession.

When you feel tenderness towards your partner, another person or your pet, not only do you feel good but you notice that time flies by.

Tenderness not only does not make the world more vulnerable, but the world would be another with more tenderness.

Such is the strength of tenderness that it is a source of endless harmony and forgiveness without the need to use words, only a look or a gesture is worth it. Tenderness is heard with the heart.

Unlimited generosity and without expecting any compensation is the result of the explosion of tenderness.

Those who risk the most in love are the bravest, generous, compassionate and tender at the same time.

Tenderness makes you great and strengthens the heart, brings out the best of the human essence and shares it with others.

Tenderness is also patience and wisdom, whoever loves has time and learns to be compassionate, understanding and tolerant. Life tends to give you back what you give.

Tenderness inspires affection, trust and dedication without measure because it is a shared feeling.

Tenderness should be the backbone of the human being and his bedside book to walk through life with a hard skin and a tender heart.

The deepest and most serene feeling that we can have is not passion but tenderness. Love without tenderness is an empty feeling.

How to enhance tenderness

Tenderness is a basic feeling, along with sadness, joy, fear or anger, that enables us to show empathy and affection towards other people, animals or things. 

To live in harmony we all have and feel the need and receive love and tenderness. Nothing easier and at the same time more difficult if one is used to opening his heart to the purest feelings.

But in reality, tenderness is manifested through gestures as simple as sweet words, caresses, care, kindness, closeness, a smile or a hug , for example. Some gestures so simple that at the same time they can open a whole world of possibilities for affection and empathy, as well as helping others to feel good.

There are also other ways to express affection and tenderness, such as a loving look in recognition, a phone call to someone we know is waiting for you, a small gift as a symbol that we have remembered something important to someone, giving up the seat in a public place to a person who needs it, giving conversation to someone who is lonely or sad, in short, there are a thousand ways to be kind through tenderness.

Obviously there are many ways to express tenderness. Sometimes these are subject to fashions, traditions, culture or personal situations, but it is certainly a good practice to listen slowly and ask for forgiveness and give thanks.



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